So glad to hear you are staying strong and while the urges are still present, the deterrents you put in place are doing their job. All we need is a delay, a moment, another second of thought that keeps us from making that first bet and what you have done is doing that for you. Very proud of you!!
Also, us addicts, are not just subject to gambling or alcohol. Work is also our addiction and while it has a much better social image it can be just as damaging to us as we put our all into it and get crushed just the same with the downs it may bring.
I love that you mentioned gardening!! We need to find the many joys in life that are not tied to obligation and try and put more effort into those.
You are obviously intelligent and I am sure you can figure out how to communicate your knowledge to the younger employees in a more synergistic way. And while it may not be fun at first, the long term results of their admiration and respect for you help and expertise will be much more satisfying than any initial frustration that occurred. I am only on day 5 and 22 hours but find truth that I am 100% normal when I see everyone’s stories. We are all normal and have obstacles to fight, daily! I don’t think of it as forever, I think of it as today and that helps me push forward. Sending love and respect to all out there going through the struggle as the struggle is real but we, my friend, are stronger!
