[ultraball]

Hey everyone. I’m a compulsive gambler, last bet July 20th, 2021. In the time that has passed since I’ve stopped gambling, I’ve noticed myself contemplating specific poker moments where I’ve both lost and won. I find that my brain is making poker seem like a game I could perfect and dominate other people, and as such, my brain feels as though Poker is a reliable source of income.

I know that this problem never goes away, and all of the extra emotions that come with this addiction never quite seem to arrest themselves. I have noticed a decrease in how often these memories, and fixations, occur since my last bet in July.

Aside from those fixations, trying to navigate my spouse’s frustrations and anger (justifiably) towards me is sometimes very difficult. I would be a fool to think that not even 3 months later would my spouse forgive me or not bring it up. I know people in GA whos spouses still blow up at them 10 years after their last bet . That being said, I’m not expecting my partner to not be upset with me, it’s just hard when they are upset to have a clear mind. Someone in my first meeting told me that if I know I’ve been doing good, and my spouse is not happy with me, then just hold onto the fact that you have been doing what’s right and try to not say the wrong thing to your spouse.

This time is not the same as last time because I’ve accepted my problem and genuinely don’t want to continue that lifestyle of mental anguish and constant anxiety.

[Autorius]

Įrašai