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    • #12695

      I am 25 and I have been gambling since I was 16. I am literally only after writing up a massive passage and I went back a page and erased it ha! I started off gamlbing on football pools as most people did. Since Ive got my first job I have gambled any wage I have ever got. In last 4 years I have been getting paid monthly and Honelsty dont think I have had money in my account more than 4 days  which means leaving a struggle for rest of month. I could get my wages up to 10/20 grand in one weekend or lose my wages within an hour of getting it. Either way It would be all gone within 2/3 days.
      Gambling has cost me my confidence and my social skills. It has destroyed my familly relationship. I have stol 4 thousand euro from my sick grandads pension money and plenty of times stole money from my mother. My bank statements are so bad that the bank actually got on to me before with a letter to house stating the were concerned an unauthorised person was using my  bank account. They couldnt believe someone woud do this with their money. I have gone casinos with a lot of money and left casinos  asking for euro coins for bus off people in street. Collecting euro coins and throwing it on roulette.
      I lost my job recently through gambling and only recently got a new one. I got my first paycheck on friday. Bad thing is I have access to gambling sites in this job on internet. Arrived in work at 9am and all gone at 10am. Only 1000 euro but Needed to pay rent that day. Worried about were I was goin to stay I eventually got helped out with rent.  I put myself through absolute torture every month. I rob food from fridge in house if I can. I purposly become friends with people I dont know in pubs. Get to know them and then ask them for lends of money with a made up story. I obviously then go off and gamble the money.
      I could go on and on with stories but I am sure most of you went through similar. Anyway I have been doing this for 9 years now and it has completely destroyed my life. I do suffer from OCD which has been very very bad at parts f my life. When I looked for support I never got it. Everyone just saw the gambling but Not OCD. This would probably lead me to gamble again and the circle would go round and round. I have moved out of my familly home 4 months ago. Mentally I am doing way better but the gambling is still there. I am refusing to talk to my familly. From my side I didnt receive support a familly should give to me  and looking from their side I have stole money from  house  so why should they care?  
      Anyway I know gambling has destroyed my life and destroyed my confidence and  relationships. I am a very very nice lad and people that meet me that dont know my history eg( people in new job here) Would be absolutely shocked hearing  things I have done. Theres Ken and then there is gambling Ken. I know I need to stop but I refuse to stop completely. i want to be able to just enjoy the betting and before I get paid I always say I will. 
      The best frame of mind I have towards gambling  is  when I have lost everything. I say to myself what the ****k did I do and ye start thinkin sensibly. When its comming towards payday and and you get paid your mindset turns complete opposite. I would consider myself to be quite lazy ( more so depressed and exhausted) but when It comes to gambling I could go 3 days straight and have all the energy in the world. 
      I am 25 now, I have lost prety much everything I could possibly lost moneywise. I dont have any kids, responsibilites or mortgages so I know things could be much worse. The way I am going though I would be fcucked in all them catagories if I had them.

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