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    • #2266
      nomore 56

      Just came across this topic and I agree with you re the anger issue. You have every right to be angry and we have enough on our plate already and we are not saints. But a good compromise might be to tell him " I am very angry because…..". Statements starting with "you…" are not really helpful. It’s better to talk about your own feelings. As for the bills, pay them, thats not enabling, it has to be done. Give him what he might need for gas to go to work or to buy lunch and insist on every last receipt for every little item. The family is a difficult issue. I did not tell mine for months that my husband was in prison. I wanted to protect them because I knew they would worry about me and couldn’t help because they live on another continent. But the truth is the truth and it helps nobody to hide it for whatever reason. My husbands folks knew about his addiction and never said a word to me. At the end he borrowed a huge amount of money from his sister, who then blamed me for the whole mess. Addiction affects the whole family, no matter what. Do not worry about the judgements. It’s not only people close to you, gambling is a touchy subject in the public eye. A lot of people feel obligated to give their opinion when they never walked in our shoes. They think that since a gambler does not put any substance in his body, the simple act of gambling can be stopped if the person only has enough will power. That will only change when gambling touches their own life in any way. Your priority right now should be your and your kids’ wellbeing and financial safety. Period.– 21/09/2012 10:31:30: post edited by janey.

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