- This topic has 4 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 3 years, 4 months ago by hopelessbear.
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30 lipca 2021 at 10:54 pm #78467avfc2612Participant
Coming back to this site because it helped me so much a few years ago, but I have majorly relapsed and desperately need the help again. This time it means so much more, now married, child on the way, if i let this really take hold again it will destroy everything, I have already lost too much.
My story—-
Been gambling for the last 15 or so years – and it has honestly been a problem for me since the beginning. I did manage to quit properly back in 2017 for a good year or so, and since then I have had a few moments of relapse, and a major one just now, which is why I am back and writing this.
I blocked every possible site with GameStop which really helped, but a few months back I found these bitcoin betting sites that are instant withdrawals and anonymous – literally no way to block yourself, so I am finding it really hard to stop.I just feel desperate to kick this for good, I hate myself for thinking about gambling literally 24/7 – I have lost so much money that is becoming really hard to hide, and I don’t want to be this person when my first child comes.
I think it helped me last time making this journal, so thought I would give it another shot.
Day 1 today. 30th July.
- This topic was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by avfc2612.
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31 lipca 2021 at 1:23 am #78469avfc2612Participant
It’s been 2 hours and I have already tried bet again. I remember the first few days being so hard the last time. Just feels even harder with no way to block these accounts/ sites. I have tried ad blocking apps on my iPhone but its too easy to delete. Any suggestions about these new types of sites would be great appreciated.
Luckily didn’t manage to deposit — so can still count myself as 2 hours without a bet – Hour by hour I guess
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1 sierpnia 2021 at 2:25 am #78483avfc2612Participant
Failed again. Back to day 1. I am determined that 1 august ,21 will be the start of my new life. I have to get it right and stop gambling, it is just so hard when I have lost so much.
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5 sierpnia 2021 at 8:36 pm #78530charlesModerator
Hi AVFC
Presumably you have to buy the bitcoins? Who could help with the acountabilty so you can’t access the funds with which to do this?
You stopped before, you can stop again. This time though remember we are never „cured.” If we need help to stop gambling then it is important to keepusing support to maintain recovery.
If your name relates to the football team and you live locally to t then you have several GA meetigns in your ara. You can also keep your thread running here.
Keep posting.
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6 sierpnia 2021 at 8:04 am #78536hopelessbearParticipant
Hi.I just want to give you a support. My problem was that I thought my mind is stronger than addiction and I could control it and quit it myself but the thing is… trying to deal with it by myself didn’t work. I kept spiral back to it and a year past. I put myself in so much debt and I know that it is something I can not do it alone and the stress that it cause me was too much. I told my partner the truth. Put all the cards on the table. He was very disappointed in me of course but he learned to understand that this is an addiction and it can not define me as a person. So We make sure that our both financials are in order, separately. I can not be trusted , not yet. We want to have a family and we want to have a baby. This is the only way I know how to protect my future child from me ruining our financials. It sucks and feeling like a big failure but I now seek helps from the addiction clinic, talking with therapist and consult with financial counselor. Everyday is hard but I think having my partner as a supporter is the biggest change for me to moving forward to get my life back and be away from gambling.
Stop chasing your loss. That what put us all in this horrible situation in the first place. I did stopped mine and I wish I stop sooner.
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