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You are certainly not alone. I can relate on many levels. I have always been very generous to many of my friends and family who never seem to reciprocate. On the other hand thier are a few people who I have taken advantage of over the years that I can never fully repay. Back to being alone. You are not. God is with you now and he will be with you when this storm passes. Lean into him. He will provide everything you need. Keep the faith Liz. Maybe you could open up to your sister?? Maybe she could help you.????