Thank you Geordie, i wondered how you were going and i am really pleased to hear that you are ok now.. I am getting there slowly slowly.. the days are going slowly forward but I am pretty determined to kick this addiction. I wont give up.. Felt like i was definately not going to make it there at one stage but today i actually think i can. I think you have to be pretty badly mangled to attempt recovery and want it.. I would have to say that now i am pretty badly mangled. It took what it took to get me to see clearly and move on. Not much interested in dates and the time factor but i didnt gamble today so im doing ok considering. The hardest part for me is letting go of the guilt. I didnt have much debt before but now i do, i will be paying it for a while and its a sore reminder of where ive been. I thank god really that this pain and absolute desperation has shot me into recovery like nothing on earth. I dont believe i could do another relapse. i dont believe i would survive it so really i think its survival skills coming out.. Im doing recovery to stay alive
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