Day 1.
I failed. I succumbed to the triggers. After 530+ days of sobriety, I failed. Despite my best efforts I couldn’t prevent myself from gambling. I had a slip/relapse and it was bad. I blew through sizable amount of my savings in the last few days.
I believe this is the universe giving me a much needed jump start/shock to get me back on my gambling free path. This is painful and I must live with the consequences.
1. I am disappointed in myself on how I let this happen. In a span of a few days I wasted close to six months of savings. A lot of money!
2. I recognized what was happening and before it was too late and I stopped but it was few days in.
3. I did not follow my routine and was not keeping my money at arms length. I thought I could control my money myself, but that was a foolish idea.
4. The phoenix will rise again. I am knocked down but I am not out. I know I built myself back up from the ashes and I will rise again!
5. Good thing is I am not in debt this time around. I still have my job.
I am filled with gratitude that I am able to recognize my flaws before it is too late.