[L4inofthewired]

Not sure how to start hating the first moment i enter a casino just happen that win too much in too little time every time i when i won then gave it all back plus more i have declared ch13 to save my house, have a beautiful wife that i feel i do not deserve on 8 times i have lied to her and leave my account empty sad part that i win but can’t leave the table or the slot until is to late i cant stop every paycheck or pay date i get anxious to go and gamble, i believe i will lose my wife i even started working a second job as a casino delaer and more than anyone i can tell you the house always win and even knowing that and knowing how the house works i go there after work to another casino to try my luck no one really wins i jave pay $4000-10000 poker hands everyone comes back everyones loses it back even knwing that i still go im no different that the player, the only good thing of being a dealer is that in a way helps me i do gamble way less now that im physically tired but every paycheck find a way destroyed my debit card and made the wife manage the money but 2 days ago i when i got another card lied again about it and spend it all left again the account emptry sad part i had double the amount of my account on the table i could not stop i could not leave the table i could not control myself gave it all plus more back
I dont know what to do really considering suicide at least life insirance would help my family not sure what to do im really on the bottom of the bottom i dont know why i even became like this, i used to have an 800 credit score loved the money too much really trying to find something that keeps me from gambling and have fails every time i cant leave the casino job not just because it pays good but because it helps my income i get taken 60% of my salary to the bankruptcy the casijo job complements my income also helpa me not gambling seeing people losing as bad as it sounds help me try not to go gamble not sure what to do anymore

[lizbeth4]

I think that most of us have thought that we would be better off dead. I think that it is a sign that it’s time to make changes. If you are feeling suicidal, please call the helpline or talk to a friend!! There are a lot of things that you can do to take control of your gambling addiction. GA meetings, GT (keep posting and reading others posts), counseling, self help books, blocking accounts and giving your money and cards over to someone else. This is a powerful addiction but there are many people here who have overcome their addiction. I think it would be very difficult to stay gamble free while working in a casino. There is always hope. Keep strong. ODAAT.

[charles]

Hi L4inofthewired and welcome. Well done on looking for support.

As you have mentioned considering suicide I think I need to give you this link http://www.befrienders.org/

As Lizbeth has said, read the other stories here. What things are helping other people that you can apply to your own situation?

You hae a lot of support available to you, for stopping gambling and for other things. Keep posting here, get to those GA meetings.

[Autorius]

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